Choosing Adoption

There are many reasons that a person chooses adoption. If infertility is an issue, many couples consider adoption when they really want a child and have decided that genetic attachments can be waived.

Adoption is also a choice for people who want to share their love with a child who needs it. They may have children of their own but want to offer a good home to another. Many foster parents consider adoption when they have grown attached to a child or children in their care.

Whatever the reason to choose adoption, it can be a long process that is full of emotional ups and downs.

Dealing with the Emotions

Choosing adoption is an emotional investment. Unlike a pregnancy, adoption involved red tape that can take you longer than nine months to walk away with your precious new addition. The first choice involves the age of the child that you want to adopt.

There are several thousand children waiting to be adopted. Unfortunately, most people want babies and these children are older. For those who want infants, the wait is definitely longer. Some turn to overseas adoptions.

Know what you are getting into. All we see is the end result of bringing home a child, but that image can only sustain you for so long. Look at the situation realistically. You could bring home a child in six months or two years.

Know your choices. There are open adoptions versus closed adoptions. You can use an agency or go through an orphanage (especially if you want an older child). Overseas adoptions are also an option.

Know the consequences. Adoptions aren’t foolproof. Birth parents change their minds. The age of child you want may not be available. Overseas adoptions require a lot of red tape in your home country and abroad and are quite expensive. All of these issues can wreak havoc on your emotions.

Handle the emotional side by considering the facts. A mother has the right to change her mind. Resist getting your hopes up until the baby is in your hands. Have a back-up plan in case the adoption falls through.

Keep your planning on paper. This still constitutes a commitment. Decorating a room for baby can be difficult to stomach if the adoption falls through. Create a budget and decide what you will need for a child, but leave it at that until you have signed the papers and the child is yours.